How to Eliminate the Effects of Negative Self-Talk

By Jimmy Warden

The Poison

I used to beat the shit out of myself with self-talk.

I’d say how stupid I was, that I had no skills, and that I couldn’t do anything right.

Those who know me well saw how I’d berate myself and turn into a different person.

There’d be a fire in my eyes, and it couldn’t be extinguished by anyone or anything, no matter how much people encouraged me or tried to set me straight.

I’d go into unforeseen cycles of anger and depression.

I was angry at myself and the world. I wasn’t proud of myself.

Then, I started practicing mindfulness.

The Antidote

Mindfulness was the perfect antidote to the negative machine I built.

It helped me separate my thoughts from reality.

It helped me understand my thoughts are not reality.

It helped me understand the narrative I created that made me think the way I did.

I started accepting evidence of personal triumphs.

I started believing in myself.

I started to love myself.

Does this sound familiar?

If this is how your mind operates, I have two pieces of advice for you.

  • It’s okay.
  • You can change it using this 4-step mindfulness framework.

How to change your mind

  1. Notice your thinking – The more you notice your self-talk, the more you’re conscious of it. When you’re conscious of it, you can do something to change it.
  2. Compare it to reality – Compare your self-talk with reality. Does it match up? Or is it a false narrative?
  3. Accept the good; let go of the bad – There is greatness in all of us. We see other people’s greatness, but we don’t see our own. Accept the greatness you bring to the world.
  4. Let go of the bad – Negative self-talk is the poison of the mind, body, and soul. Don’t let it kill you.

So go change your mind.

Notice those thoughts.

Separate them from reality.

Find your best self.

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