Letting People In

By Jimmy Warden

How many times in your life have you told someone you were fine when, in fact, you really weren’t?

At this point, probably too many times to count. All of the reasons why you’ve done this could include the following, you didn’t want to burden them; you thought they were being nosy; you were afraid to open up and be honest; you didn’t want to talk about it.

Now let me ask you, have those choices ever made you feel better in the moment?

Chances are, no.

We have a hard time letting other people into our lives for the reasons I just mentioned: We think we’re burdening other people; we think they’re being nosy and want dirt on us; or we’re simply afraid of what might happen if we’re open, vulnerable, and honest.

The kicker is that if we’re going through hard times and want someone to help us, we have no choice but to let others in.

We have to be open to that idea. We have to be open to letting someone know about parts of us that we may be ashamed of. We have to be honest about our current set of life circumstances, and we have to be vulnerable enough to share how we truly think and feel. All of those actions are no easy feat.

When we do this, however, a weight gets lifted from our shoulders. We may, in some cases, feel physically lighter after the encounter.

It also builds trust in the person we confided with. After the interaction, we’ll know that we can go to them with a personal problem when necessary. It also opens up more opportunities for that to happen again. It creates a strong, two-way bond between ourselves and those we converse with. The intimate moments with other people that never occurred due to our fear will start to happen more frequently because we’ve shed the layers of worry. Worrying about our life, worrying about what others think of us, and worrying about sharing our struggles.

It’s going to take courage to begin this process, and at the end of the day, someone has to go first, so why not us? We’ll have to be brave, even with people we already trust, but it will be worthwhile for our mental well-being.

We don’t need to open up the floodgates of our personal secrets to strangers on the street. We do, however, need to open up in small ways to the people around us. It will improve our relationships; it will increase our integrity; and we’ll feel a lot better internally because we won’t be bottling up as much of our thinking.

Although it’s daunting, give it a try. Baby steps at first. It just might be what you need 🙂

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